Wednesday, June 2, 2010
What do you want to be when you grow up?
When I was 5 I wanted to be a veterinarian -- until I learned you had to put animals to sleep.
When I was 11 I wanted to be a flight attendant
When I was 16 I wanted to be a genetic counselor
When I was 19 I wanted to be a research scientist / professor at a college
When I was 21 I got pregnant ... when I was 22 I got married. I finished my bachelors of science and now I am a tech in a university.
But it's not what I want to be when I grow up...
This job is different than I thought it would be. It's not harder; it's not easier. It's just different. I enjoy science. I enjoy working in a lab. I just don't think it's what I want to be doing for the next 30 years.
Plus I'm kinda stuck here. To move up in this world I either need a higher degree or more experience. To make more money I either need a higher degree or more experience.
So about a year and a half ago I sat down to really think about what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I know it is not to be a scientist. I'm just not cut out for that job. I don't think the way that my boss does, and I'm fine with that.
But what about teaching? My mom is a teacher, and I personally think it is the best job to have if you have kids. You get the summer off with them, you are home in the afternoons. It just works well.
I could teach science! I'm cool with that, but I need an educational degree ... I'm gonna kinda shorten it here for yall:
--found a wonderful university online to get a Masters in Education (recommended from a friend at church as well)
--found out I needed a credit I didn't take in college before I could enroll in their Masters program
--that credit was offered in a DANTES test, so I signed up for it
--failed the test by 1 point
you have to wait at least 6 months before you can take a credit-worthy test again
--was told this university would not allow me to get a Bachelors of Education because I already had a degree
--signed up to take the test again (June 3, 2010)
Today, I got an email telling me that the testing center at TSU is canceling the test for tomorrow because of a family emergency of the proctor (person who leads the tests) and they don't know when or if she will be back. They are sending me a refund.
How do I know this isn't a way that God is telling me I shouldn't be a teacher? I mean if this is where I'm supposed to be, if I'm going to be a teacher one day, why is it so hard? Did I mess up? Did I miss something somewhere?
or it could just be the devil trying to put doubt in my mind.
How do you know? How do I know what I supposed to be when I grow up?
Where's my sign?
I know a job doesn't make me who I am; it doesn't define me, but I don't want to be at a job that I hate or I don't like going to. and I wish I could be a stay-at-home mom, but that's just not in my family's good fortune right now.
I applied for an industrial job last week. **fingers crossed**
I want to be a teacher one day. I want to teach science in either a high school or community college. One day I will be a teacher...I think?
Oh, how do you know?
"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!"
25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[b]?