Tuesday, April 20, 2010

The common house spider

I had a great lab meeting and my presentation went really well...expect I think I overloaded my brain.  Now I remember why immunology was the hardest science class for me in college.  So before I start going through my meeting notes, I thought I'd pop by here and share with yall the story of my incounter with the comon house spider last night.

**its kinda long, but I think worth the laugh read**

I'm getting ready to go to bed last night.  We sleep with a sheet, blanket and then duvet on our bed.  I noticed the blanket wasn't on our bed.  hmmm...must have fallen off last night during ... well...this is a family friendly blog, lol!  So, I reach down onto the floor to pull the blue blanket back up onto the bed.  I'm straightening it out and that's when I notice it.  A freaking huge spider!!!!!  I HATE spiders!!!!  So, what do I do?  SCREAM at the top of my lungs!!!!!  ANDREW GET IN HERE!!!!  **side note, we live in a kinda small apartment and the wall our bed backs up to has the couch on the other side.  really all I had to do was say his name really loud, but somehow screaming seemed such a better idea**

The spider is wrapped up the blankets in the far corner of the bed.  I'm sitting making myself as small as I can on the opposite corner.  Andrew comes in: "yes?"
Me: "THERE'S A SPIDER IN THE BLANKETS.  KILL IT, KILL IT NOW!"
Andrew:  "Oh, where exactly?"
Me: "in that blanket!!!  Kill it!"
Andrew...going to get a shoe: "Yeah the neighbor was talking about how he was seeing alot of big spiders in his house.  He thinks they are the common house spider or something."
Me (thinking): I don't give a hoot, just kill the dang spider!  (well, if I'm honest my brain cusses...)

Andrew gets the shoe and moves the blanket of course in my direction.  He can't find the spider.  So now I'm standing up on the bed and screaming "OH MY GOODNESS KILL THE SPIDER".  He finally finds it and kills it.  I look at him terrified "Why did you flip the blanket towards me????"  He answers: "I don't know.  But at least I didn't use your shoe."

Spider dead = the end, right?

So, I'm getting up to grab a new sheet for the bed, because you can't use the one with spider guts and shoe ick on it.  And of course, Andrew is mocking me.  Now I have to insert here that I am one of the most gulible people you will ever meet.  Maybe its because of my naiive trust in people?  Or maybe I'm just gullible.  I was one of those kids that if you said "There's gulible written on the ceiling" I had to look.  Just had to!  I mean, what if it really was and I missed it?

So, Andrew is mocking me nonstop...oh, there's a spider on the dresser, oh there's a spider on Marty's cage, oh there's a spider on the table, and then oh, there's a spider on the ceiling.  Of course I've checked each place...just in case and of course there was no spider.  I look at the ceiling (getting tired of his mocking)..there is no spider on the ceiling.

And then he talks to me in that super-serious you have to belive me voice, and I'm hooked.  "I know, it just fell into your hair."
Me: "oh hahaha, ok there is no spider in my hair"
Andrew: "No really, don't move I'm going to come get it out."
Me (starting to panic): "you're kidding right?  There's not a spider in my hair..."
Andrew: "Don't move."
So of course I put my hands on my head...
Andrew: "Oh my christy it just went into your hair"
I'm on the verge of screaming again and almost in tears when he comes over and messes up my hair and says "I'm just kidding baby...(me = sigh) but be careful because the spider had babies"

Me: "What!  No, you're not fooling me again, there were no babies..."
Andrew (while shutting the door, kinda in that sing-song voice): "Ok, sure, whatever you say, I didn't see any babies."

Now, I'm in a dark room, sitting on the bed completely freaked out about spiders and starting to get concerned that there are baby spiders crawling around our room.  The panic factor creeps in, but I don't want to get off the bed.  What if they are on the floor?

"ANDREW, get in here, are you kidding, are there babies, OH MY GOSH, come back, I can't go to sleep, YOU HAVE TO TELL ME THE TRUTH!!!!!!"

He comes back in and calms me down.  Of course he's joking again (not very funny jokes...) and I go to sleep and dream about spiders.  Oh yeah, called the pest guy and he's coming on Friday, lol!

11 comments:

  1. eeek!! I would have been the same way im terrified of spiders

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  2. Oh my goodness! He is too funny! I hate spiders too!

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  3. Oh I am right there with you! I hate spiders! We recently moved to a new home and I love 99% of it...the one thing I hate are all the spiders. It got to the point where we (my husband) were squishing 5 spiders a day. He bought some of these sticky spider traps (they are supposed to be non-poisonous, but not sure if they're a good thing or not...I know spiders eat other bugs...but EEEW I can't take it anymore). We (he) have not looked in the traps yet, but we have not had any spiders as far as I know, for the last 2 days (knock on wood).

    My girls aren't afraid of them at all. It's like they want to make friends with the spiders! I'm glad they don't have my phobia!

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  4. LMAO! I was rolling on that one...only because I sympathize...ok, actually it was really funny. :)

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  5. OH! I hate spiders too! I freak out when I see them and kill them at all costs, after I get courage from freaking out and screaming.

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  6. Sorry this story had me rolling. I so would have been the same way wondering if there were more to come.. I am like that with flying bugs..

    Have a great day and watch out for those spiders.

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  7. I have something for you on my blog today..

    http://keepingupwiththeschultzfamily.blogspot.com/2010/04/honor-roll-and-more.html

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  8. I HATE spiders! I could see that very exact same story happening to me! My anal a** changing the sheets and my hubby mocking me! lol

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  9. I think your husband and my husband would make good friends, the jerks:) I'm the same way-once my hubs was on the east coast for business and there was this HUGE spider in the upper corner of my bedroom and I started flipping out, and texted him a picture of the spider and was like, what do I do? And he's all, well, hon, what would you like me to do about it seeing as I'm 2500 MILES AWAY? Uh, good point. So I killed it with a broom, and slept on the couch that night:)

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  10. OMG, spiders are my biggest fear! If Ken told me there was a spider in my hair, I would seriously make him sleep in the guest room for *at least* a week. As I was reading this, I kept seeing glimpses of things I've done in the past...so you're not the only one :) And Immunology at Auburn was killer, for reals!

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  11. That was funny! My hubby has a similar sense of humor. Amazing that he has survived this long!

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